"Put your best foot forward!"
That's what we're told. In job interviews, in relationships, in life. Put your best foot forward. Which essentially translates to "hide all of your flaws until you've gotten what you want, be that a job or a boyfriend." Which is fine, I understand that sentiment and even the need for it where jobs are concerned. Where it starts to worry me is when I start to see that slipping into my relationship with God.
Because if you are anything like me then your prayers are more often about others rather than yourself. They take the form of "God, so and so needs a heart/kidney/lung." "God please be with so and so because they need a job." "God please bless so and so as they go on missions." Those are all worthy prayers but when that is the extent of it the that isn't good. Often my prayers don't look like "God, I wanted to sleep with my boss today." "God I was so angry at so and so that I started to think of ways that they could die." "God I ignored my neighbour's texts and calls... not because I didn't have time for them I just genuinely can't stand them." "God I'm addicted to porn.... I can't stop." "God I've been thinking about divorce a lot." We shy away from those prayers.
And there might be a lot of reasons we do this, after all hiding your sin from God is as old as Adam and Eve, but I think a big reason we (and when I say we, I mean I) do it is because I'm scared of what He might say. When I have been broken down to nothingness, when I can no longer take pride in any part of who I am, when I have admitted feelings to Him I wouldn't speak openly to any human being, ever; I'm scared of Him rejecting me. Of Him saying, "wow you are a sinner. A sinner and a disappointment. Why don't you try harder not to sin? Why are you never good enough?" That's what I'm terrified of hearing from God Almighty.
But maybe He wouldn't say that? Maybe He would say, "You are pleasing to Me." And when you finally find your voice again to ask Him how He could possibly be pleased with a person who has thought, said, and done the things that you have, He responds, "My pleasure in you is not based off of what you do. You cannot earn My love. I have placed Christ in your heart, He is pleasing to Me."
Because if He said that then it would change everything. Because if He said that then you are already living in victory. Because if you are pleasing to God then what else is there to achieve? And when you no longer have to claw your way to His pleasure through guilt-ridden obedience, when victory becomes your jumping off point, then the command to "go and sin no more" suddenly doesn't seem so crushing. When Christ is living in you and you know that before the throne of God you don't stand condemned, when you have heard that from God Himself, then you have the power to resist the devil. To not lust, to not steal, to not let anger drive you, to not do all of the things that were keeping you from being honest with God in the first place. You have the power to love, to have peace, to live in joy.
Why wait until the end of your life to hear God say, "well done good and faithful servant"? Probably because so many of us are worried that He won't. Everything changes when you start with honesty with God. Your relationship with Him being first and foremost. No longer is He the over-bearing master ready to find fault. Out comes the Father who loves His children; and it's so much easier to talk with a Father.
In no way am I diminishing sin. I heard a quote the other day that said "when we think too lightly of sin, we think too lightly of the Saviour." That's not what I'm getting at here. We need to strive to drive sin from our lives. But not out of guilt. Not out of an insane urge to "be right with God." Jesus made us right with God. There is victory in the cross. And when victory is where you start, not weighed down by all of your sin but genuinely set free in Him, then who knows where you will end up? For me, at least, it all started with honesty.
The only thing you have to lose is pride. The only thing you have to gain is.... well... everything.
Just something to think about. My love to you all.
That's what we're told. In job interviews, in relationships, in life. Put your best foot forward. Which essentially translates to "hide all of your flaws until you've gotten what you want, be that a job or a boyfriend." Which is fine, I understand that sentiment and even the need for it where jobs are concerned. Where it starts to worry me is when I start to see that slipping into my relationship with God.
Because if you are anything like me then your prayers are more often about others rather than yourself. They take the form of "God, so and so needs a heart/kidney/lung." "God please be with so and so because they need a job." "God please bless so and so as they go on missions." Those are all worthy prayers but when that is the extent of it the that isn't good. Often my prayers don't look like "God, I wanted to sleep with my boss today." "God I was so angry at so and so that I started to think of ways that they could die." "God I ignored my neighbour's texts and calls... not because I didn't have time for them I just genuinely can't stand them." "God I'm addicted to porn.... I can't stop." "God I've been thinking about divorce a lot." We shy away from those prayers.
And there might be a lot of reasons we do this, after all hiding your sin from God is as old as Adam and Eve, but I think a big reason we (and when I say we, I mean I) do it is because I'm scared of what He might say. When I have been broken down to nothingness, when I can no longer take pride in any part of who I am, when I have admitted feelings to Him I wouldn't speak openly to any human being, ever; I'm scared of Him rejecting me. Of Him saying, "wow you are a sinner. A sinner and a disappointment. Why don't you try harder not to sin? Why are you never good enough?" That's what I'm terrified of hearing from God Almighty.
But maybe He wouldn't say that? Maybe He would say, "You are pleasing to Me." And when you finally find your voice again to ask Him how He could possibly be pleased with a person who has thought, said, and done the things that you have, He responds, "My pleasure in you is not based off of what you do. You cannot earn My love. I have placed Christ in your heart, He is pleasing to Me."
Because if He said that then it would change everything. Because if He said that then you are already living in victory. Because if you are pleasing to God then what else is there to achieve? And when you no longer have to claw your way to His pleasure through guilt-ridden obedience, when victory becomes your jumping off point, then the command to "go and sin no more" suddenly doesn't seem so crushing. When Christ is living in you and you know that before the throne of God you don't stand condemned, when you have heard that from God Himself, then you have the power to resist the devil. To not lust, to not steal, to not let anger drive you, to not do all of the things that were keeping you from being honest with God in the first place. You have the power to love, to have peace, to live in joy.
Why wait until the end of your life to hear God say, "well done good and faithful servant"? Probably because so many of us are worried that He won't. Everything changes when you start with honesty with God. Your relationship with Him being first and foremost. No longer is He the over-bearing master ready to find fault. Out comes the Father who loves His children; and it's so much easier to talk with a Father.
In no way am I diminishing sin. I heard a quote the other day that said "when we think too lightly of sin, we think too lightly of the Saviour." That's not what I'm getting at here. We need to strive to drive sin from our lives. But not out of guilt. Not out of an insane urge to "be right with God." Jesus made us right with God. There is victory in the cross. And when victory is where you start, not weighed down by all of your sin but genuinely set free in Him, then who knows where you will end up? For me, at least, it all started with honesty.
The only thing you have to lose is pride. The only thing you have to gain is.... well... everything.
Just something to think about. My love to you all.